NONSENSE NURSERY RHYMES A-M

Andy Dandy’s legs were bandy

Andy’s legs were bent

Through Andy Dandy’s bandy legs

The trains to Scotland went

 

Bobby Shafto’s gone to sea

Sailing with a chimpanzee

They’ll be back at half past three

Bonnie Bobby Shafto

 

Cock a doodle doo !

I think I’ve caught the flu

Shiver shiver cough cough

Atchoo ! Atchoo ! Atchoo !

 

Doctor Foster went to Gloucester

On a winter’s day

An icicle froze

On the end of his nose

And didn’t fall off till May

 

Elsie Marley looks so fine

Dancing down the washing line

Will you be my valentine

Lovely Elsie Marley ?

 

Fee fi fo fum

Little Freddie’s looking glum

How to make him giggle

Give his toe a wiggle

 

Georgie Peorgie pudding and pie

Thought he’d catch a fish to fry

Cast a line above his head

Caught an aeroplane instead

 

Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall

Humpty Dumpty had a great fall

He didn’t get bruised, he didn’t get bumped

Humpty Dumpty bungee jumped.

 

I had a little nut tree

I gave the tree a whack

The tree said  “Oi !

You naughty boy !”

And whacked me sharply back

 

Jack Spratt could eat no fat

No sausages no stew

His beard was much too bristly

And it wouldn’t let things through

 

Katie Beardie had a cow

That learnt to drive. Don’t ask me how

The other cows just moo or sleep

But Katie’s cow goes Beep ! Beep ! Beep !

 

Little Bo Peep has washed her sheep

They’d got so grey and greasy

But after a scrub

In a soapy tub

They came out white and fleecy

 

Mary Mary quite contrary

What does your garden hide ?

Beetles and bugs

Slithery slugs

And shells with snails inside

(Written by Richard Edwards and illustrated by Chris Fisher)

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